Being a greenhorn parent that is trying to find my way without giving my child a one way ticket to the therapy chair can be daunting at times. I know that God has given me the sense and intuition that I need to raise my child right, but I often get lost in feelings of frustration, fear, or failure. The endless ticker tape of questions run through my mind.... "Why won't he stop crying? What am I doing wrong? Is he breathing? Why doesn't he like squash? Did I really leave the house with only one diaper? Why is her child so calm? Am I a horrible parent? Dear God please help me survive this day!"
My journey as a parent has just begun, and I am already spending too much time worrying. I have forgotten to be present in the moment. Survival mode has kicked in; yet, I have come to realise that I need an attitude shift, or else I will miss out on the joy that comes from being a parent.
A friend once told me that she reminds herself daily "that these times are precious and they will never come again" when parenting becomes rough. I like this thought process. It takes the focus off of the negative and pushes it into the positive. Sure my son's diaper has just exploded all over him and me, but when I say to myself "these times are precious" it suddenly lightens my heart. I can see the humor in the situation and I can laugh at the moment. I have suddenly shifted from a negative feeling of frustration at huggies to laughter - I am truly living in the moment.
Life is so short, why should I waste those precious moments on worry, doubt, or frustration? I can't afford to! My son will never be this small, this innocent, this snuggly, or this completely dependent on me. All to soon he will be too big for my arms, too old for lullabies, and too grown for bedtime kisses. I could get lost in the sadness of these thoughts, but instead I choose to enjoy every minute that I have with him at the age he is right now. To stop myself from looking ahead, and rest in the joy of this second. Doing this helps me (and my son) find happiness. God wants me to enjoy the blessings that have been given to me...and my child is one of my greatest blessings! Whether I be covered in burp up or kisses, I have to embrace the moment and realise that I am blessed! So I have begun to choose to sink my toes into the sands of time, lay out my beach towel, and relax; because these times truly are precious.